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strange little girl
lately Suomi posted some interesting thought, she said: "I was afraid that when the hiatus comes there'll be nothing to talk about with her". I know she didn't mean me (did she?), that's not the point. this make me pretty uneasy that after ME worn off and me being w/out Internet-connection for some time there'll be nothing left in common with me & my Commander. I've grown to love her deeply, I know we're not 'friends', but still. she saved me in some way, helped me out when I really needed it and... it'll hurt more than a bit, I have to admit. it still bugs me that there ain't any other links between us but ME. are there?..

I've been acting dumb with so many people lately. like I'm 17 again. even this blog is pathetic. I'm whining like a teenager. though I feel pretty grown up dealing with really meaningful & important stuff.

today one of cool people unfriended me on @diary because she didn't want to read posts about ME after EC DLC, but she didn't unfriend other common acquaintance. I felt really bad, dunno why, I know it doesn't mean anything, it doesn't even worth bothering. but it hurt me.


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